fall 2010

in a few days / i'll be living along again.
b's exit has been rocky but i think i've handled it maturely & respectively as possible given the situation

things i'd like to do in near times:

- write a fantasy novel.... maybe for children & adults
- sew & craft more... maybe even for sale
- pay off debts... i don't like stress related to $
- get more at home / mightinvolve painting the walls / painting more in general / getting a couch

i haven't found the right words to respond to j's letter / i loved it so much, it really struck me in so many ways
i'm knitting him a scarf because i don't really know what else to do, but perhaps it could be accompanied with some words

halloween was so much fun for me this year / i would really like to take some time & think back on all of the awesome costumes
between gypsopheia masquerade / khyber dance / halcon - halifax's first ever comic convention [it was like costume dream land for me] + j and i go to work on a space helmet together which trulywas so great.... even if it flopped a little.



who put the blam....

still soaking in the attention&love, its nice
looking forward to my return to halifax

hermeneutic circle

lets make the whole thing up

a. superiority complex in that inner confidence isn't rooted in reality & therefore can sometimes lead to letdowns - especially when making bombastic assumptions.
b. inferiority complex in that outter confidence may not be rooted in reality - so what>

- i want to get into this world but... i dislike the overuse of the word 'reality'

* you'll find the path you need to be on & know when you're trodding the right way
* i love you & think if they regret to inform you of acceptances that i fully accept you 100%
* besides i couldn't live without you :]

some interesting searches last night:
hermeneutics - collective concepts such as language & culture [hermeneutics as alternative to cognitivism].
syntactics: relations among sign in formal structures
hermeneutic circle: reciprocity between text and context

i'm dreaming about hearing convesations under water / hearing chimes and feeling sunshine flood into the water below
i'm dreaming about bridges/ axis that connect people

things i wat to read more about: umberto echo / mme. blavatsky, aristotle / semiotics....  love


i cherish the scientifically unexplained

key to calming down

i'm writing / getting excited for making my first film [albeit, one minute in length].

going to montreal this coming thursday & very much looking forward to visiting w/ esther & maybe even doing a litte perfomance art with her band

spring is here - had 1/2 grapefruit & some boxed cereal :) in the backyard with the cats this morning.

the breeze will wash over me
here and in the otherplaces i am about to visit

i willingly teeter back to center
let my heart be a stone i throw



i am picturing ponds with lotus flowers & floating candles hovering just above the water.
let the magical moments want me too.

be comfortable - give yourself a shoulder rub.


doom season for budhists nearly over?

i've had a sinus flu for the past 4 days & evenings - the pressure is horrendous!
sat. i slogged through & sold a bunch of silk heart sachets i'd sewn [100 % of proceeds go to adsum hous - a shelter in hfx for women & children].
i attempted work today but only made it about an hr. in when irealized that my thought processes were being interupter by the pain in my eyeballs.
first headache in about a year - what a doozie.

all this time laying around in bed has got me to thinking about what i need to be doing more of in my time.
-meeting new ppl.
-crafting w/ the old

i'm having a difficult time determining if i'm happy - not a good sign.
i know i was about 3 months ago....

there's a harshness - almost a cruelty that i'm not too familiar with that i keep sneeking glimpses of.
i wish for nothing more than to find a new kind friend to console with...
i'm more emotional than usual & i think it because i cannot find anyone to relate with right now.

i'm going to start writing more in the evenings - i see this as a good outlet, going to check over at the zine library tonight for some inspiration.


muchmuch love


mister fergus is losing his mind

my dad told me last year "they weigh you on the way in & they weigh you on the way out"....

since i heard it - it has sporadically come into my head walking around the city
some days it means more to me than others

. today i wonder, where are my parents ?
the last i hear they were on the natchez trail - or was it nach.... hrrmm

also! i'm opening my heart & it feels good.
tonight i am going star gazing w/ + a piece of apple crumble + a hot chocolate

have a fun wknd :]

* hoping amongst breakfast w/ mimi.... volunteering @ vic. hall ... massage ...and food club i'll have time to finish the 5th business + tattoo nylons & farm sea kelp......

lets do exactly what we wants to do

i need to pair down a few of my objetives for the next month - 6 months...
here are a few on my hotlist:

- take behavioural psyhology course via AU
-  volunteer at 2 new loations
- book a trip to india... not sure whereabout yet, any suggestions for 1st timers ??
- silk sreen nylons / pin cushion teacupts / more sewing !  crafting
- wait patiently to see if i get into grad. school
- read ~ 8-10 books that i have on my shelf but haven't gotten to....
- sell my car & buy a microbus :|)

had a nice day in the snow-sun
lets do more skating!

hothead hotbed

so.... i stopped dying my hair [though i love! having different colour up there ]
instead i've been using different spices mixed w/ henna
last night - i tried the oh so lovely mixing of cinnamon / cloves & a touch... just a touch of cayenne pepper
bad idea... my scalp was inflamed for a few hours afterwards...
funny - i thought i had/have a high tolerane for hothothot
turns out i may be more sensitive than i thought.\
somehow this fact amuses me - i'm not hurley burley  ?

further to this mishap - i passes out at the bloodbank today
that is a first for me & i think my ego was scarred just a little

i need to correct some path that i seem to be living just a hair astray from
it must be setting me off - that MUST be it.....

clumsy schmumsy,


i've been noticing that i keep stories/letters/any writing that other ppl. have given me & they are starting to amass in one drawer of mine that i really feel i too mentally full at the moment.
mainly there is an amassing of artwork that i personally feel is mildly offensive to women & think it might be time to let go
esp. since a lot of it was never intentionally given to me - but rather left behind

how do you like to purge?

3D universe....

jeesh!  seems like eons ago i was a sci-phi pilot.... the formative yrs :P
i regarded the members w/ such awe... i'd be interested in having convos in the future to est. if i still feel the same way.
euclid - 310 yrs before the birth of you know who envisioned being able to project 3D objects off of 2D surfaces!  we did ya proud.

i'm on a quest to align my person with my personality and i'm going to begin this atunement by painting my 2 favorite cats
i've got one ear to the ground & the other to my heart
dentist appointment today.... perhaps last weeks teeth dream was a little foreshadowing,..?...


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